family, grandad, grandparents, love, poetry, rhyme

The House that Grandad Built. 

You are everywhere, 

But nowhere in sight.

Teak wood glory,

A nod to your trade.

I had never noticed,

The gleam of the gold mirror’s frame

On your living room wall,

Yet now it’s vintage presence

Has pride of place in mine.

And what of the music

That you spun her around to

At just 16 years of age?

I will dance all the same

Underneath our slanted ceilings

As he takes my hand.

All four of the rooms

Contain a token of you,

Of memories before my time

That your love can no longer

Quite remember to recall.

Each day I sit upon your chair

But no longer on your knee,

I sit beside a new man,

With whom you would be pleased.

Your home and your history

That you had to leave behind,

Now sit upon the table tops

And fill the walls of mine.

 

©livingthroughlines 2017.

 

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alzheimers, poetry

Alzheimer’s Part 2: December 2014

You spoke words I could rely on,
You were a hand that helped me through,
You were a mind full of wisdom;
A crucial part of how I grew.

But as the seasons change too fast
’94 became 2015.
Your mind is changing, rearranging
Whilst you lose a sense of me.

Fragile autumn leaves
Don’t drift away from me.
Setting winter sun,
Your light won’t be undone.
Fading memories, dying mind
I will never leave you behind.

I beg you to remember,
As you fumble through your thoughts,
All you’ve said and done for me
Not all, at all is lost.

For the fifth time since sunrise
I will listen to your same tale
And to humour your soul once more,
I’ll pretend I don’t know it well.

Fragile autumn leaves
Don’t drift away from me.
Setting winter sun,
Your light won’t be undone.
Fading memories, dying mind
I will never leave you behind.

alzheimers, poetry

Alzheimer’s Part 1: January 2014

This is probably one of my favourite things I’ve ever written, largely because of the fact that I felt I managed to capture so perfectly all that I want to say to my Nan.


I wish that I could find you
When you don’t know where you are
And I wish I could explain it all
Without you forgetting each part.

I pray the days get better
Though now they just simply fade,
I hope sometimes you’ll remember
What we did earlier that day.

It’s hard to watch you cry
and know you don’t understand,
and even harder to laugh it off,
make it ok and hold your hand.

And if that hard day comes,
when you can’t remember my name,
I still am not a stranger
And i’ll love you all the same.

So take my hand right here
And hold onto me tight,
Tell me all that you remember
From memories of each day and night.

I’ll forgive you for cursing,
for your anger and your words,
because I know this isn’t you
that everything feels strange and absurd.

I want to say I’m sorry,
that this had to happen so soon
no one ever deserves this,
and most certainly not you.

But one thing, please remember
As everything else finally fades,
We love you and we always will
Beyond your final days.


livingthroughlines 2016.